Where information appears matters - Online practice 4

Read before answering

Original opening, 'The unread message': During the long bus journey I had decided not to answer. At home the kitchen was quiet, apart from water ticking into the sink. My friend's message was still unread. I opened it, typed a sentence and erased it. Then I wrote, 'Can we talk tomorrow?' My thumb hovered. I pressed send. Notice how much story time is covered by each part. A short sentence can isolate a moment and slow attention; it does not always make a scene feel faster.